In a mood

 God I'm in a shitty mood today. I shouldn't be.. it's a beautiful sunny October day. Yesterday I decided to commit to returning to Central America to attend the wellness retreat again in March 2026. I am going out tonight to a concert with a friend. Life is good. But holy fuck I am in a pissed off shitty bitchy mood, and I feel tired.

My washing machine is a piece of shit. My body aches. I didn't take a walk yesterday. I feel fat. I feel angry. I feel like work is a pain in the ass. It's so fucking busy. Every time I delete an email, another one comes in. My cat is being annoying. I have a stye on my eye for the first time ever and it's been there a week so I'm only wearing glasses and I want this shit to heal and it's taking forever.

I'm 29 days into Sober October and haven't had a drink and just last night told my therapist how great that feels. So why the SHIT MOOD today?

WHO THE FUCK KNOWS!!

I suppose it could have something to do with the evil anti-christ leading the country. The cold weather coming on. My inability to be as disciplined as I want. It could also be the whole bag of candy corn I ate in about 3 days. I'm disgusting.

Haven't heard from T. in a month. He's had me blocked that entire time. Fuck him. That whole thing was a joke and a waste of energy.

It's only 12:30 in the middle of my workday and I am so tempted to get high. I know it would "help". But I guess I'll wait until maintenance looks at my piece of shit washing machine this afternoon. I hate the appliances here. I hate everything!!!! Andddd there's another work email. Tell these people to shut the fuck up.