April 29, 2011

A chance

Ok, let's try this again: I GOT A JOB! And I start tomorrow at eight in the freakin' morning. Go me.

In other news, I"m skinny but bloated because it's that time of month. Intake has been decent. Sometimes, like last night, I look down and can't believe how thin I feel. I view my thinness through detached eyes. I am the thinnest of all my friends, and yet it's not enough for me. Why can't I be thinner than everyone in the world? Ok, that's a silly thought. I don't want to look like a starving Ethiopian. I just want to be perfectly thin and lovely. Is that too much to ask for? If only food wasn't necessary to survive...

So far today I've had one cup of coffee, and about two sips of this nasty strawberry smoothie my brother made. Luckily he told me that it was made with whole milk. Upon hearing that, I poured it down the drain. No one saw me do it. I'm sorry but I don't do full fat dairy if I can help it. It's fucking disgusting to me. Almond milk all the way, baby!

I've been taking walks and trying to move around a lot. This new job will require me to stay active and on my feet; I'll burn calories and I'll even be outside a little bit, which will make me tan, which will make me look thinner. WIN!

How are you guys doing? I love how were all in this together. This thing called life. The starvation diets, the fasts, the restriction, the weighing, the mirror-checks, the obsessive thoughts...ahhh :) It's all good as long as were not alone.

Well, just wanted to tell you the good news! I have to finish getting ready and drive over there so they can copy my driver's license and social security card for tax purposes. Then I'm going to return a purse and do a little shopping, to celebrate! Then hopefully some happy hour drinks with my friends! I won't be staying out late tonight! I'm excited, you guys, I really am. I NEED this to work out. Pray for me. Or, cross your bony fingers.

THINK THIN!!!!!!****

<3 Sar

5 comments:

Aye Ell said...

Congraulations!

coffeeXandXcigarettes said...

Congrats on the job, I hope you love it. :-) Good luck

Fed Up said...

Good luck on your new job and congrats on feeling skinny. It's one thing to be skinny and entirely other thing to actually see it and believe it. Which is the good part and why we do this crap in the first place.

Lita said...

Congratulations! Also, have you ever heard of breatharianism? It's a concept in which believers claim food and possibly water are not necessary, and that humans can be sustained solely by prana, or, according to some, by the energy in sunlight!!

Liberty said...

You know what I like about anorexic girls blogs? They are SMART and they know how to write! Anorexics may be crazy as fuck, but they are more intelligent than most of the fat asses walking around.