well hello

well hello

Sunday, March 23, 2014

Relaxed reflections

A day off! What to do? I think I will rearrange some furniture. It's Spring now, after all. Always a great time to refresh the space or look.

Speaking of which, I have great eyebrows. I have been "growing them out" for awhile, years maybe, because I overplucked a bit in college. My aim has been to achieve a fuller, face-framing look and it's here. I pluck, I've never gotten them waxed. Maybe I'll show you sometime.

What's been going on with me: Work, lots of it. Surprises taped to my front door from my best (guy) friend, C. (Who I've wrote about before). Getting over being sick. Binging a little, feeling fat and thin in the same day. Lots of weed and music. Encounters with exes. 

My mood has been somewhat stable this week. There are a few things I've done lately that make me feel proud of myself. Like when someone gave me too much change while breaking a twenty dollar bill at work, being honest and giving the ones back (instead of pocketing them). Or when I asked my dad to have dinner, just us two, and we went. Or when I stopped at my friend's house who was having a bad day and cheered her up.

I've been working on being more honest. I am trying to rack up positive moral karma. I am trying to be a good person. I AM a good person. A great person? TBD..

I know I've been wrong and bad and been involved with dishonest affairs of the heart and mind. I am not perfect. I have struggled and self-sabotaged. I will most likely continue to fuck up, as people tend to do. But I have been making a concentrated effort to "do the right thing". When I try to explain this to the few people I've tried to explain it to...I've been met with silence or questioning. Do you understand?

It's my day to myself and I vow here and now that I will not waste it. Granted, it's 12:15 and I'm still drinking my coffee and trying to get motivated. Mary jane accompanies me. Also, the xx radio on Pandora.


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