A bag full of thoughts

We made it to the weekend! Tonight I am going to an office xmas party, not just any...it's my last place of employment haha! I'm sure I mentioned that my friend still works there, well I am going along as her date! I am wearing a super cute and fitted black dress, black heels, and gold jewelry  My nails are a deep festive blue with sparkles.

I am currently drinking some delicious coffee called "Jamaican Me Crazy". I watched "The Five Year Engagement" last night and thought it was pretty good. Emily Blunt is so perfectly thin. And her last name rocks.

I'm also smoking and pushing back the guilt because I should really quit if I want to get a real job. Damn drug testing! Stopping college grads from getting big girl jobs since the 80's.

I feel funny about this (edited to say: which I shouldn't, it's my damn blog) but it must be expressed...I feel like my friends are slipping away from me. It's sucky but most likely true. Intuition is usually correct. Yes, I will see my three "closest" girlfriends tonight, and I am looking forward to it, but with a heavy head...

It seems like they haven't been including me as much in previous weekends and also like my texts go unanswered a lot lately. I feel scarily uncertain in my bonds with them in this vague way that maybe only another pot-smoking food-obsessed twenty-something weirdo could understand.

It just occurred to me that it could be me, pushing them away and choosing to surround myself with many men, coinciding with my retail work schedule which includes nights and weekends. So maybe I am overreacting, putting something where there is nothing.

I do that a lot.

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The job interview went really well the other day. I'm hoping for some good news next week. I just want to achieve my goals I WILL achieve my goals!
"I am lucky in career" ~ "I am lucky in love" ~ "I am lucky in life". . .remember this always.

Catch ya'll later.
-Sar