Good day. It is almost two o'clock in the afternoon and all I've eaten is cottage cheese with strawberries and blueberries. It is a small portion. I barely have an appetite. It's different, all of a sudden I just lost the hunger. I am okay with it, actually, because I am clearly losing weight. Bones, bones, and a nicer face because some of the fat has melted away. Seeing myself on Tv really showed me that I have a fat face. I have always thought it, but was never absolutely sure. Until now. So maybe that contributes.
I am sort of a mess. I have been so damn busy. I cannot believe everything that has been and still has to be done. Ugh. I am ready for a break, but that is simply not an option. My moods are unstable. I haven't slept properly in over a week. Sleep, who needs it anyway?
I have less than a month of school left. Then comes summer and moving to my parent's house. I wonder what the hell I'm going to do next.
I am hoping inspiration comes to me all of a sudden. I smoked just now. Still kinda am actually, but it doesn't take much anymore.
My entire life is changed and I hope for the better.
You wouldn't believe how petrified I feel. My security, the only sense of safety I've ever known, is gone. Simply vanished and I must move on!
First things first. Activate cell phone. Go to store. Shower. T. Meeting. Study. Sleep.
I can do this.
[on an empty stomach]
bring on the cigs
everything is better as long as I am getting thinner..