well hello

well hello

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

It's early.

Second day of class. I already saved some homework to do before it starts at 9:30. Typical of me, I go on and on about how I want to prepare and follow my routine. Well I am not off to a great start. Yesterday I didn't eat until lunch, then has salad and half of a veggie panini at school. Then nothing until about five hours later, when I ate 3/4 of a Luna bar. Yum. Then I went shopping with my friend and got high before and after. Needless to say that is where I fucked up. I got the munchies and ate a bag of apple chips (not terrible), a Cliff Kids bar, SHELLS AND CHEESE, tiny bag of sunchips...what the hell happened there?? It just goes to show..when I don't eat breakfast I get super hungry and weak towards the end of the night.

Then I threw up. : /

It was easy, but I really feel like I stopped it sort of early. It is exhausting and terrifying, this power I have over my body. Mind over matter. I am so tired today. My stomach feels incredibly full still. No food today. I WILL get to school early enough (I walk!!!) to grab a black coffee before Philosophy. That is my morning plan. I will be out of class at 11, so here's hoping I don't cave and get lunch again :( Maybe if I keep it tiny, low cal, and low fat...like an apple, or another salad. We will see..I have a 3 hour break between classes, so how about I try to NOT fuck up today?

Oh one good thing, last night I passed on dinner at the buffet style dining hall on campus with some friends. I knew that it would be hard to resist the deliciousness that awaits me there. Ok, got to go unfortunately. I need to shower and do this homework; I love reading your blogs, and my own, day and night, first thing in the morning (to check for comments). It is thinspiring. I will do good today. I do not want to b/p..it is so not worth it. Ok STAY STRONG & THINK THIN THIN THIN THIN THIN THIN THIN THIN THIN THIN.

p.s. my kitten is totally hyper this early in the morning, I wish I had his energy..

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